Victims of narcissistic abuse must work through a significant amount of complex trauma when they finally end the relationship. Navigating the divorce process is emotionally challenging, and it becomes even more so when it involves a narcissist. For this reason, it is paramount that you hire an attorney who understands what you are going through and knows how to help you find a resolution despite it.
In our experience, we have encountered several people with narcissistic tendencies. Not only does it lead to failed marriages, but many people in the legal system aren’t fully aware of how damaging a narcissist can be to adults and children. What’s even more challenging is that victims of gaslighting and narcissism are often the worst versions of themselves. This makes it difficult for people to separate victims from abusers. One of the key indicators that someone is a victim is that they question and blame themselves.
As a future client, you should understand that lawyers have their own personalities and legal approaches. Some attorneys embrace fighting and, in doing so, may even fuel the narcissist. These are not attributes our firm embraces because we don’t want to act in a way that isn’t in your best interest over the long term.
When You Don’t Know Which Way Is Up
Leaving a volatile relationship can leave you disoriented, and you may be worried about caring for and protecting your family. These are the types of people who need a mental health professional and an empathetic attorney. After being gaslit for an extended period, you will question your choices. Although we can recommend mental health professionals to contact, we want to give you clear choices regarding your divorce. We want you to know that we hear you and that we get it. One of the hardest things for us to tell clients is that airing their story and pointing the finger at the narcissist is validating, but it may not lead you down the right path toward an effective resolution.
One of the best ways to heal is to separate yourself from the person and to give yourself time off from being in fight or flight mode. Granted, this is difficult during a divorce and impossible when children are involved, but we respect that you are processing and recovering. We will never add to your plate unnecessarily. For example, we may receive emails from the narcissist or their attorney filled with more abusive or underhanded comments. We take the following approach to shield you from something potentially triggering:
- We read the email entirely.
- We explain that we aren’t going to send it to you because it won’t be helpful.
- We review what it said using our own words, so you aren’t forced to read it.
Meet the Compassionate Attorneys at Easterling, PLLC
We have firsthand experience dealing with narcissists in our own lives, and we understand what you are going through. Additionally, we know how to balance support with effective legal advice. Sometimes all you need is someone who can empathize and confirm what’s real and what isn’t. We want to be part of your solution. Contact our office to schedule a consultation.